A Friend at the Y

She said the word “nigger” out loud, loudly, in the locker room.  I wouldn’t even print the whole word here if she hadn’t said it out loud, so loudly.  It makes me cringe, cower, not want to be in the conversation.  But she has lived with it her whole life.  It follows her like a shadow, without benefit of a sun to warm her.  It is always there, even when silent, unspoken.  Even when spelled like this “n****r” How can a white person begin to understand that?  I don’t think that we can.  But as I told her, we can move forward.

It is so hard to separate “what happened” from “what is still happening” from “what could/should happen”.  I believe that we meet people, not by accident, but because we are supposed to.  Call it Karma, fate, synchronicity, Devine intervention, whatever.  We are here to learn from each other, contribute to each other’s future.

My friend has a story to tell.  We all do.  We have voices that may or may not be audible.  She had such passion sharing her story with me today.  She conveyed the feeling of what it was like to be a young black girl and feel safe.  What it took, how she got there and why she still looks around her in the parking lot at night.  I encouraged her to share her story with others.  To write, express herself, find her voice.

This is not a sauna story, but we were about 20 feet from the sauna, and we referenced the sauna, so I’m saying it’s close enough.

I am not the only “My Name is Zelda”

Now this was a shock.  I Googled “My name is Zelda”, thinking that there would be one hit.  There were a  bazillion hits.  I Google everything I can think of now.   Bubbles tells me all the time to “Google it” when I don’t know the answer to her questions.  So of course I tell her to Google it.  Why should I do all of the work?  But I digress.

It turns out there is a movie called “My name is Zelda”.  There are dogs who have their own blogs whose names are Zelda.  There is a calender of such a dog being sold at Books A Million (we saw it).    You can buy (and I might) t-shirts emblazoned with “My name is Zelda”.   I know there is a computer game called Zelda, but I made up my name in 1978, possibly 1979, but definitely way back then.  Find out why, here.

So what to do.  Hmm…  I am not willing to change my name, I just thought it was more unique than it turns out to be.

Yesterday, my favorite Uncle, we’ll call him John, came to visit.  It is always great to see him, but it was amazing to watch him pull out a $2.00 bill for Freddy and give it to him because he thought he wouldn’t have one.  Amazing in that mom sent him one last week for the same reason.  My mom has “issues” with her brother, but for them to do the same random act at almost the same time is pretty, well, amazing (and synchronistic).